Sorry seems to be the hardest word for me, well USED to be. its not that hard anyway. in fact, u'll feel bettteeerrrrr after that.
If i were to die tonight, at least ive said sorry to these few people that i love. its kinda hard at first, well, i think its the power of ramadhan. bulan baik kan, syaitan pun takde, so yeah, whats the point of you going to terawikh kumpul pahala, buang dosa and to start fresh on the very first day of puasa if your heart is busuk, still bermusuh with some other people. kan kan? its time to put a dot. maybe things will not be the same as it was before but its ok, one step at a time. theres no point to gaduh bla bla bla. you and me are big enough.
I realised now, the power to be happy does not rely whether you have a boyfriend or not (i used to think that way, i felt very down thinking that im the only single in my bunch of friends. some of them are even getting married soon) but yeah, after the breaking-up, i realised that time will heal and having an amazing friends does help in a way. they have been here for me all these while. sometimes, i do feel like they dont really love me when i got scolded by them for being such a foolish young lady yang menangis tak henti2 mcm org bodoh, but its for my own good, i know.
My family has been tremendously great. no words can describe more. i was sicked for more than a week. i didnt eat, i cant sleep, all i did was crying. my workmates were great as well. ouh, saya sangat sayang kakak-kakak di office saya. mereka sangat sangat baik. kak yah followed me to the ladies and waited for me outside the ladies with a tissue box and her shoulder to cry on. walaweehhh, terharu! i've only known them for a month, but it feels like years knowing them.
I met new friend. i can say he/she does contribute a lot in my process of healing. haha. i dont know why. dont ask. he/she is a nice person tho. baik dan bertanggungjawab. i like and i respect you new friend. ;)
My old friends. it was nice to have a mini gathering with you girls. i miss my high school life!!!! i miss my Convent. the teachers and the pupil, saya rindu kamu semua. sangat. most of the girls are now out of town. some in uk, some in aussie, one in paris (i have a designer friend.fuh~), all over the world lah pendek kata. its great to know that they are now doing good with their life. working, furthering their studies. wow, im super proud of you girls, insyaallah i'll be joining you guys soon, im still planning anyway, planning some of the things that i wanted to do before i turn 30. hehe.
Well this is my prayer.
"Ya Allah. Please forgive me for all the sins that ive done and please let this feeling stays forever.amin"
The most important part is,
I think i found my happiness after i seek them from Him. He didnt just gave me happiness, He gave me strength and a new spirit of life as well. Thank you and alhamdullillah.
p/s : hopefully aku sedar diri sampai bila2, takut lepas bulan puasa ni, tak ingat diri balik, haih.
